Tuesday, October 28

I got cored!



Yep that is right.. I went in for what was supposed to be a surgical consultation on what was going to be a biopsy tomorrow. Well apparently they thought they could do a "core" to get a sample, if it works then there is no need to do surgery, the whole anesthesia, O.R., thing.. stuff that doesn't seem like fun to me anyways. So this "core-ing" thing is basically the same thing thing the did in Oklahoma the "fine needle aspirate" only they didn't use a "fine needle" they used a friggin straw!... and no I am not kidding!... I am so glad I didn't see the "corer" until they were done.. I still did manage to pass out... yep... I passed out... lol. During the first pass... he got nothing. Then he says are you willing to try again.. I asked what his odds of getting something this time would be.. "50/50".. Well I would rather try that again then have surgery, and put off chemo another week, so lets try again. nothing. So again..... hmmm. maybe from a different angle... he got a little that time. So lets try it one more time.... That time.. yes 5 times!... I got cored 5 times! we still don't know if he got enough but he thinks so, if not, I have surgery scheduled for next wednesday, with pre op the day before... yuk! atleast I get to sleep through that one. If they did get enough then they cancel that surgery and chemo goes on as planned. So that is what is going on here. passing out, more needles... atleast it leads to a good story huh? Well ya wanna see a picture of my owweee... (that is what Cameron called it when I got home, he noticed it before I got to hold him.. he said "owww, ooooo" and pointed while staring at it... cute kid)

Sunday, October 26

Guilty pleasures

Jackee tagged me a while back and seem to be putting it off for some reason.. so here it is..

1. Sleeping in.. way to late
2. Napping.. (do you see a pattern here?)
3. Blogging
4. Watching old TV episodes Online (Gilmore girls, Veronica Mars...etc)
5. Reading other peoples blogs for way to long...
6. ICECREAM
7. Dried fruit
8. Chips with salsa, Fritos with dip
9. Eating food that I bought "for Tyler's lunch"
10. My parents buying something for the boys that I knew I would have had to buy anyways, therefore freeing up money for something "fun" (that sounds way worse than I thought it would)

I tag Kristi, Jen (both of you), and anyone else who cares to share...

Wednesday, October 22

Standford apt...

So we just got back from Standford, I have Stage 2A (favorable) hodgkins lymphoma... I will be having a biopsy next Wednesday and will start 8 weeks of chemo the next week. I will take chemo once a week except for two of the weeks I will have it twice. Chances are I will loose my hair..lol. After the chemo is over I will have radiation. I am supposed to remember that this is curable and that the goal is to have me back to as good as new by this time next year. After chemo and radiation and I am found "clean" I am considered to be in remission until it comes back, or I hit 5 years at which time I am considered "cured"... so we have a goal= 5 years. FYI, this shouldn't do anything to my fertility, but we are not supposed to get pregnant for 2 years... which was in our plans anyways... but I sure do hate it when people make my decisions for me...(stubborn, bigheaded.. I know, but really...) Anyways... that is all I we know now.. I am planing on taking a class about managing life with chemo soon, it will be good to get details like what I should and shouldn't eat and why I can't be around animals (thank goodness, for this purpose my kids are not considered animals) ... thanks for the prayers! Although the treatment won't be pretty, the unknown is the hard part!.. and now we know.

Monday, October 20

Kevin's first day of pre school

So today was Kevin's 1st day of preschool... and the teacher even said he could come back!. He was so adorable, Today was orange day and he wore an orange shirt.. (his favorite with a light up dinosaur on it).. Here are some pictures... the teacher said he asked for me, but didn't throw any big fits or anything and when I went to pick him up he showed me the picture of a pumpkin he colored and his orange project (gluing of a bunch of orange things to a piece of paper)... Him and cousin Cambria seem to enjoy it... and I have to say with his routine all messed up it will be good for him to have something to count on. Check him out!

Sunday, October 19

so...

What do you think of my new background?.. I LOVE IT!!! Thanks Tammy... it's a keeper!

Wednesday, October 8

Woohoo!

Well for some real news... my surgeon called Stanford and found out that we have all they need to get me in the program out there... so... I have my first appointment in two weeks! I still may need a biopsy, but they will decide when I get there... so I could be having treatment in as soon as three weeks! So we are gonna leave on Monday or Tuesday and take a while to get out there... We will probably stop by and see some family in Provo (all of me and Tyler's brothers live in Provo).. and then head our way out there to get settled. Hopefully we will be back sooner than later so Tyler can get back to his PhD...

Tuesday, October 7

Update..

So I got the PET/CT scan done today and we heard back from the surgeon. I have cancer in my neck (duh) in a couple places and some in my chest. "some good news and some bad news" From research I have done on Hodgkins this means I have stage 2 cancer. Which is good and bad.. but here in my mind we only look at the good. This means that it is only above my diaphram, if it were above and below.. we would have even more issues... So the surgeon wanted to talk to the radiologist a bit more and is also calling Stanford to find out what else they need so I can start treatment out there. My Mom is flying in tomorrow to help me get through whatever else I need done here; another CT scan and a bioposy probly and then help me pack and drive with me and the kids out to California. (Tyler will be staying out here to finish the semester and Mom will probly be staying with me until Tyler can come out and stay in California.. his PhD is getting put on hold until this mess is under control....)
Today was ruff... in a funny sort of way.. I passed out.. yes yes.. I know... laugh your heart out.. I have low blood pressure... whatever.. I am a wuss, I get it.... It was pretty funny listening to the guy tell the other guy how he was just sitting there talking to me and all of a sudden I start "slipping out of my chair"... have I ever mentioned how I hate needles..grrr..
Anyways the hard part of the day was not being able to touch my kids... I was to keep them at arms lengths away because I was radioactive... funny, yes... for no reason was I supposed to hold them in my lap and really didn't want them to be close at all. (I had to drink lots of water and it all flushs into my urine, which is held in my bladder... hence the no kids in my lap thing....) I have to flush twice!.. is that not the funniest thing ever.... Thank heavens Tyler can be home on Tuesdays except for one class in the evening... and thank Godness for Lori who has no problem holding my children for me.. Although it was nice to get out of changing diapers for a day.. I missed holding my babies... oh and no more breastfeeding... had to give that up with all of this. Poor kid. Oh well I think he will live...(1 year and 25 lbs later.. he is healthy) Well best be going to bed.. need my sleep! Wish me luck on hearing from the doctor, so I can get to treatment faster!

Sunday, October 5

Kevin cuteness..

Ok, so a while back when Kevin would wake up in the morning or from a nap I would ask.. did you sleep good?.. he always answers yeah! and then later he started asking ... mommy did you sleep good in your bed.. yeah I did.. then later on he started to ask.. did baby sleep good in his bed.. yeah he did. And just recently it is turing into a long conversation... did mommy sleep good? Did baby sleep good? did daddy sleep good? did Andrew (his best friend) sleep good? Did Lori(Andrews mommy) sleep good?... yep, they all slept good. in fact when he doesn't want to go to sleep he lets me know "but Mommy I sleep good all day!".. in other words "I can't sleep now!"

And over the past month he has started noticing the dark at night.. I have explained that it gets dark because the sun has gone to sleep (which means it is night time) and it is almost time for him to go to sleep... then the next morning he says where did the dark go and I explain... the sun woke up and now it is light outside... ver fun stage I must say... he says something new everyday and asks the cutest questions.. I think I'll keep him around! :)

Friday, October 3

Camerons 12 month pictures


Here are my two favorite collages

I refused when Kevin was little to have pictures of Kevin taken in the nude but for some reason I thought this was cute... and this tall one was cute with his eyes!

I loved these ones!

I thought this one was adorable with the cupcake mess... I totally think I will do this with the rest of my kids.. he loved it and we got some cute shots!


Come on.... he is like a model... for cake frosting(not biased am I?)

Adorable!.. I could stare at my kids all day..
You know this is why Mom's have blogs.. to show off there kids!!


Thursday, October 2

Cameron 1 birthday apt

Cameron had his 1 year apt today...
he is 30 inches in length (I think he is longer
but he won't sit still) which is 50th percentile
and
he weighs 25lbs which is 75th percentile.

Update..

So, we are in the waiting game again. I went and visited the surgeon on Tuesday and he wants to have a PET/CT scan so they can see where else the cancer is. The small needle biopsy seems to have the cancer cells of Hodkins Lymphoma but they like to see a whole node with it to be sure. So this PET/CT scan is basically them shotting me with radioactive sugar and then watching how the cells in my body use them (cancer cells use sugars faster-by the way I find this stuff very interesting) So after this test we will see where else the cancer is in my body, (and be able to tell me what stage I am in) and maybe see if they want to biopsy something else. We are looking into different places to do treatment.. here, in California and in Washington- (California and Washington to see if we could stay with family so the boys will be ok while I don't feel well) My appointment for the PET/CT is next tuesday morning. So we are waiting until next tuseday to see, oh and we should have the results to that test next wednesday.

Monday, September 29

OK.. here is the story..

Ok so the news travelled quickly... I just want to let you all know that I am fine.. we don't have any definite answers.. we are in the waiting mode right now
Two or so weeks ago I noticed a lump on my neck and after a few days of shrugging it off, I mentioned it Tyler and he being across the room from me told me He could see it, I thought hmm that is weird. Then Tyler talked to his Brother, Dr. Mark and asked him about it... he said go see the doctor.. and I thought.. that is weird. well it came up again while I was making appointments for Kevin's 3 year and Cameron's 1 year well baby apt, I Figured I could go in and show the doctor so that I could check it off my list. He ordered blood work to see if I had Hypothyroidism (it runs in the family).. blood work comes back normal the next day and the doctor schedules an ultrasound to see if it is a thyroid goiter.. So in I go into the ultrasound. Tyler wierdy decides to go with me and gets a babysitter even though we know we won't be getting any results that day anyways.. weird I know. So that was Wednesday, they show me that left side of my thyroid and how weird it looks, this "lump" is 5-6 centimeters and usually goiters are about 2 centimeters. Worry and fear sets in.. the ultrasound lady says she is gonna get the pathologist to come in and look at it. They decided it would be best to do a biopsy and do it right then! I don't even get to sit up.. they do three biopsies, by needle...(I almost pass out about it just thinking about it) and I come home with a sore neck and an ice pack. Friday they call with the results.. p.s. that wasn't actually your thyroid (the cells wern't thyroid cells) they think they were actually lymph cells and they are thinking it is more Lymphoma or Hodgkins lymphoma. He says he is sorry that he has to tell me this over the phone because he knows I will have questions but that he wants to make appointment with a surgeon to have a (larger) sample taken of this "lump" so that they can "get me to the right people" which in my head means an Oncologist. There is still a possiblility that this isn't cancer at all but Tuesday at 10:30 I go in for a pre-Op consultaion.. we don't know when surgery will be or if I will stay over night, if they will test the sample while I am on the table, or if I will come home and wait some more but that is the idea... I may have Cancer.. just saying that is kinda sureal. Long term.. if I do have lymphoma there is surgery and Chemo in store... so that is the story.. don't feel bad if you did not get a personal call.. we were kinda keeping it on the down low until we found out everything... but really we are laughing and making jokes becuase at this point there is nothing else to do.
Me after my FNA- Fine needle aspiration

Saturday, September 27

We got callings...

yep they need us to "feed his sheep" so Tyler has been called as a Ward Missionary.. (fits him perfectly) and I am in a whole new world.. no girls camp or canning for me.. I am working in Compassionate service.. (what that entails. I have no clue, but I am sure I will figure it out when it is needed)

Friday, September 26

He is 1!

Happy Birthday little one: we love you so much! We are so glad you came to us and that you smile for us everyday! Your brother has a surprise for you.. he helped make your cake... and he will definitely help you eat it too! Thanks for bringing your personality into our home and making our family that much warmer!

Here is my little dare devil... apparently this is how you are supposed to ride in the stroller.. ( I can't believe that I have had it wrong all these years!)

These I took on his last night being 11 months old.. right before he went to bed.. next time we see him he will be birthday boy!



Here is a video of him walking a couple of days ago... now he is walking room to room and not even thinking about it!.. he is so much fun (mostly because he still isn't fast enough to get away from me)

Thursday, September 25

Kevin birthday pics..




I Know its been a while.. but life keeps getting in the way of my plans... Apparently we didn't get very many good pictures.. I never like the ones of them opening gifts.. cause they are usually hidden behind it... (see above)

Wednesday, September 24

Its been a busy week...

for my little one... he got two more teeth AND started walking... that is right... here we are days before his birthday and he just started walking... All of a sudden is letting of of things, putting his hands high in the air and going for it... cracks me up how cute he is... fist time was 8 steps then 15! He just keeps doing it.. he even did it for Grandma and Grandpa on the web cam last night. Kevin keeps trying to lift him up on his feet and telling him to "walk that way" while he points... I just told him that he should ask baby to "come here!, come here baby!" it almost worked... once.

Tuesday, September 23

Cameron...

...got his 7th tooth! It is the top one second to his right... yep two days ago... Yeah.. at least I can be done nursing in 3 days.. count them three! woohoo.. bring on the chocolate!!!

**after I posted this I had another look and his 8th tooth broke threw! the top second to the left...lol

Sunday, September 21

Kevin's 3 year checkup

Kevin had his checkup last week and He is healthy and has great lungs... he screamed the whole time... and he is 75th percentile height and weight, which has never happened before.. he has always been like 10 percentile height and 90th weight... funny kid.. but we are now in the proportional life... lol. go Kevin!

Wednesday, September 17

72 hour kits

Here are the assumptions you need to think about when planning your 72 hour kits:

(These are general assumptions if you want to see what kind of emergencies are most likely in your area check out www.weather.com/ready click on the map to find what you should plan for)

Planning Assumptions

  • Electricity will be out for 3-4 days.
  • Drinkable water will not be available for 2-3 days.
  • Telephone service will be out
  • Gasoline pumps will not be working.
  • Trees and debris or flooding will block some roadways.
  • Minor medical services will be required.
  • Emergency services (police, fire, and rescue) will be unavailable for 2-3 days.

Food
You should always have three days worth of non-perishable food (that does not require refrigeration.) Examples include: canned meats and vegetables, canned milk and juice, peanut butter, granola/energy bars, crackers, cookies, candy and food that meets special dietary needs. Your supplies should be checked and/or replaced every six months. (Review them when you change your clocks for daylight savings time.) Make sure to include a manual can opener and cooking utensils.

Drinking Water
Keep a minimum of three gallons of drinking water for each person in your household. In a disaster water may become contaminated or pipes may break leaving you without safe water.

Water for Cooking and Cleaning
In addition to drinking water, you also need three days worth of water for cooking meals and personal hygiene. Another gallon per person per day is the rule of thumb.

Medication
Have at least one week's worth of critical medications in case of emergency. In addition, a comprehensive first aid kit is critical.

Children
Emergencies can be overwhelming to kids. Have an activity kit ready for them. Suggested items are: favorite books, crayons & coloring books, stuffed animals, dolls, cards, board games.

Elderly
Physical strain is difficult for the elderly. They are especially susceptible to heat and dehydration. Take extra precautions to keep them cool and well hydrated. Make sure to stock up on all required medications. If you have a relative in an assisted living residence, learn about their plans for dealing with disaster and evacuation.

Mentally or Physically Challenged Individuals
Make sure to consider how mentally or physically challenged relatives condition will affect them during an emergency. If they take medication or require the use of specialized equipment, make sure that you have enough to last a week. If you don't live with this gingival, contact their local police department or caregiver and find out what local officials are doing to ensure their safety.

Pets
Not all shelters allow pets because of hygiene issues. Contact your local emergency shelters and find out their policy. If you are allowed to bring your pet, you will have to show a copy of their latest vaccination record. Also, make sure your pet has a leash, collar, ID tag, food, water, bowls for food and water, and a carrying case. DO NOT ABANDON YOUR PET. If your home is not safe for you, it's not safe for them. Locate pet-friendly motels nearby and keep their phone numbers handy. Have three days of food and water for your pet on hand.

Now that you have some assumptions in mind here are some ideas as to what to have in your 72 hour kits...

https://registration.weather.com/ursa/ready/form

Now I know what you are thinking... this is gonna be a lot of work.. but I must say start small... after Tyler and I got married. Our 72 hour kits started in a gallon sized Ziploc bag.. and all it had it it was free stuff we had taken from a hotel room, a sewing kit, shampoo, conditioner, travel sized soap, etc. From there we got back packs: (and no we still don't have everything, but a good start)

That is the next thing to think about... where and what are you gonna store all this good stuff in:

I like the backpack idea, but have figured out... there is a lot of stuff to put in a back pack.. at some point the boys are going to have to carry some of their own stuff, of course a great idea came from my sister in law: she has a back pack for everybody and they are all stored in a rolling tote(Rubber maid hard plastic): so if she can she just throw the rolling tote in the car and go, if that isn't possible they roll the tote as far as possible and then carry the backpacks from there. If rolling isn't a good idea, they put their back packs on and get a move on... Tyler and I love the idea of "rolling with the punches" wheels would make it a lot easier, especially for the elderly who can't carry much! (Of course if sheltering in place is he best option, then you don't have to take your packs anywhere)

I personally have a stroller in my car as well as at home waiting if I need it. with little ones who can't "carry their own weight" this is a must! Carrying your children is not a very good plan if you plan on getting very far or getting anywhere very fast!.. (of course if flood waters are deep-strollers won't work)

So find out what emergencies you need to plan for, how you are gonna store it, and where, then start collecting- most of the stuff you already have around your house. Now for the first-aid kits, the best way to get started is to go buy a kit already put together at wal-mart (or other like stores) they usually cost about $10 and have all the essentials named in the link above.. (gloves, antacids, bandages, gauze... etc) if you want to add to it.. great!.. but it will get you headed in the right direction)

And you have to remember if you are told to evacuate.. do it! There are always thing outside of your 72 hour kit that most people would want to take if the idea is the your house will not be standing there when you get back: (things on my list)


1. the dogs- People and pets are the most important!
2. my pictures- Everything can be replaced except pictures
3. our fire box with all the important documents (some important docs should be in your 72 hour kits too)
4. any extra water

And one hint to always be prepared: keep you gas tank on the top half- you get better gas mileage and you might be able to get a little further if needed.
Oh and other good links to check out:

Ready.gov - they have a great place for kids to "get ready too!"
FEMA.gov - they have a plan for ya
beprepared.com - they have already-made 72 hour kits that you can buy or just steal ideas from

ok so this is already mondo long so I will be adding more posts later: I know there will atleast be posts on car kits, office kits, school kits and the like.. have any specific quesitons about what is stated above or what is to come... just leave a comment for me.. thanks! and good luck packing!

Sunday, September 14

And the winner is...

72 hour kits/ car kits/ office kits/ school kits.. So look for that coming soon! Thanks to everybody who voted!.. I will get on that soon.. Then I might follow up with the household items (room by room) and the food basics (what to store and where).. I haven't decided...